My Story
This story was originally written to serve as my bio on the website. My wise website developer and social media guru suggested it may be a bit lengthy, however, told me it was authentic and that was a more important factor. While every word of it is true when I saw the length on the website and especially on my phone I knew it had to be scaled down. However, I wanted a way to share the full story of a life filled with transitions and how I came to a place to pursue life coaching as a career. My guru friend suggested putting it into a blog post. So, what follows are the events leading to my decision to become a life coach.
Many people try out multiple things while they are growing up, developing skills and talents and gaining a sense of what path they wish to go down in adulthood. Some have a solid understanding of what they want to spend adulthood doing as a career at 18, while others navigate through several majors in college before choosing a career path. Then there are people like me who had no idea what they wanted to do in their late teens and well into their 20s. It’s not that I didn’t have any interests. I always had a natural curiosity for a variety of things, but my interests and desires were not nurtured while I was growing up, leaving me to put things to the side, saying “I’ll do that later.” I’m not blaming my parents for this lack of interest in my interests - they had their hands full with my intellectually disabled brother and money was always tight. But I learned at a young age to stay quiet, not rock the boat, and do my best not to take any more of my parent’s time than necessary with my interests or passions.
My experiences growing up created a lack of self-confidence, a deep need to “people please,” and a fear of failure. I spent much of my late teens and 20s floundering. I went to a community college and took four years to get a two-year degree. And while I liked my work in the world of computers, I was never passionate enough to seek a higher degree in my field or pursue something more challenging. Additionally, while many people in their 20s are exploring their world and developing passions and interests, my lack of confidence kept me from exploring my true passions in life. All of it left me feeling frustrated and lost.
Then after a lot of research, I decided to return to school. A month before turning 30, I moved out of the only state I had ever lived in to pursue a degree in Speech-Language Pathology. Even while attending graduate school, I felt a deep fear that I had chosen wrong but repeatedly told myself it was the demands of school making me feel that way. I also frequently felt stupid and lost in school and life. While in school, a professor, a friend, and a meditation teacher helped me see myself and my life from a new perspective. With their assistance, I learned I was not stupid, that my needs mattered, and that I didn’t need to constantly stretch myself thin to be loved and appreciated. I started to intellectualize (but not yet internalize) that I was an individual who deserved love, respect, and kindness.
My growth continued as I started “forcing” myself to face fears, including becoming a traveling therapist. During this time, I completed several 13-week contracts around the USA and drove solo across the country four times! In between contracts, I was fortunate enough to take time off to travel to other countries and pursue other hobbies such as SCUBA diving, hiking, and wine tasting. Navigating my way throughout the states helped increase my confidence, intuition, critical thinking skills, and organization. It also increased my passion for travel and when I returned to living in one location, I continued to travel; with friends and solo. I loved all of my journeys, but my solo trips felt so liberating as I was on my agenda.
As a Speech-Language Pathologist, I always enjoyed the “helping” aspect of my career and loved connecting with others, but I couldn’t deny that it was becoming harder and harder to go to work each day. I didn’t enjoy how healthcare facilities treated people as transactions and felt helpless in my role. Around this time, I started looking at ways I could apply the skills I had learned to a different aspect of my current profession or another profession entirely. Early in my research, I came across Life Coaching and within a week, I treated a 75-year-old patient who told me she had just become a certified Life Coach and, without knowing my interest in the field, told me I’d be a great coach. Shortly after that, a Life Coach training and coach who assists other coaches in business start-ups, more or less, fell into my lap.
Initially, I allowed fear to get in the way of becoming a coach. After a few years and another training program, I finally found the courage, knowledge and tools to set out on an entrepreneurial road as a Life Coach. The rest is history and I’m so happy I’ve found a path to helping others increase their happiness, passion, and confidence for a transformative life.